Performed by Val Cole

POEM:

I write a lot about intimacy. I write about my understanding of it. Using cannibalism and feasting as metaphors for sex. About bruises and teeth as symbols of love. Of fighting and commitment, all things both cruel and kind. But what I don’t write about, is the empty echoes of shuddering starvation that comes from years of neglect. Craving and aching for touch, only able to seek a mere fraction of feeling from family and friends. I am celibacy and disgusting longing made flesh. Love given form and family. I am Agape, made from the sweetness of Aphrodite, blood and foam. Each one, a thing that slips always out of touch, a fragment of memories and fondness. |

I am the voyeur that watches. Hidden in the corner of the house, half covered by wallflowers and wind-faded wishes. Dandelion hands reaching for my own version of the sun and always stopping short. Watching on at scenes of intimacy, constantly grabbing the remote and rewinding before the moment can end. An ever-desperate loop of time and loss. Sun sets and cloud hidden lies. My skin prickling with goosebumps. A rash of allergy and need. I am burning in an empty house, having long lost the keys. |

I am the knowledge and the history of sex, unwilling to begin such a resentful dance again. Things learnt and lost through experience and pages I hate. I hate sex, I hate touch. The longing and anxiety that hangs behind each movement. The atoms that haunt the spaces previously held. And yet, I still crave, with every drop in my human body. Each pull of desire drawn from my breath-strangled chest. I find myself repulsed, even as I creep closer to that ever-living edge. |

Get to know the poet:

1) What is the theme of your poem?

"Intimacy – The Duality of Being Ace" explores my experience as an asexual individual. In this poem, I aim to highlight the themes of alienation and touch starvation that can arise from navigating life as someone who is both highly anxious and disinterested in sexual intimacy. The poem presents the perspective of an outsider who recognizes the potential for connection yet chooses to reject it, all while yearning for the warmth of human touch.

2) What motivated you to write this poem?

An urge welled up within me while I was at a friend's house, prompting me to open my notes app and write. I typically don't assign an overarching theme or structure to my poems during the initial writing process; that comes later. What began as a spontaneous outpouring of words on my phone screen eventually evolved into the polished piece it is today, shaped through rewriting and editing.

3) How long have you been writing poetry?

I have been writing for as long as I can remember. I can vividly recall participating in a county-wide poetry competition during primary school in England, where my first piece was published in "Little Laureates" in 2007, when I was just eight years old. Since then, I have continued to write, even during times when I didn’t publish new work. Now, at 26, I reflect on nearly 18 years of writing.

4) If you could have dinner with one person (dead or alive), who would that be?

If I could meet anyone, living or dead, it would be Mary Shelley. She had such a fascinating life; for instance, she carried her husband’s calcified heart in a silk pouch. Later, when she was older, she kept it wrapped in a page from his poem "Adonais," stored in her desk. If that is not poetry, I don’t know what is.

5) What influenced you to submit to have your poetry performed by a professional actor?

My mother played a significant role in this journey. When I mentioned that my poem had been published and that there was an opportunity for it to be read by an actor or adapted into a film, she encouraged me to pursue the reading, even offering to pay for it. I’m so glad I took her advice—it turned out wonderfully.

6) Do you write other works? scripts? Short Stories? Etc..?

I mainly concentrate on poetry, as it is my true passion and area of expertise. However, I occasionally experiment with short stories. I also write for my website and, of course, for my university assignments.

7) What is your passion in life?

I aim to become an accredited Australian editor and a published poet, as this is my greatest passion and driving force—my dream, in essence. One day, I hope to edit others' poetry and short stories, guiding them through the publication process and enabling them to experience the joy of sharing their work.